Before I get into it you might want to check out the link above. While many think this is a bad idea, I think it's one of the hottest things out there. A perfume that makes you smell like pussy. Why the fuck would anyone want to smell like a fish market?? Apparently you buy this perfume which I'm sure is vastly overpriced and you spray this shit on you and you'll be smelling like your lady's vagina in no time. You're probably asking yourself why the fuck would anyone buy this and it's the worst idea you've ever heard. It's time to think outside the box. Whoever came up with this fantastic idea is a genius and will make a tonne of money.
First you have you have to think of virgins. Not only do virgins miss out on getting vagina, a lot of them only know what it looks like from a screen. The counter-strike loving fucked up people this world produces has never touched, smelt, or fucked a vagina in their life. Somewhere in this world there are a bunch of people aged 18-45 wondering what a vagina smells like. If you tap what I tap then a trip to Spadina (china town) would suffice but to get a more accurate sense, virgins all across the world should be lining up to purchase this shit. The second greatest use and one more helpful for the rest of us, especially myself in trying to dump someone. Unfortunately, in this fucked up city of mine there are not many hoes. This isn't Montreal or NYC where girls are contented with a one-night stand.
In Toronto the girls, regardless if they are hot or not all have the personality of zoo animals. There is no compromise because they won't let you hit it on the first night. A bunch of fucked up, pretentious bitches (remind you of someone?) So if you're like me then you have about 6 relationships going at once in an effort to tap multiple vagina. It's a rotation similar to to the 5 disc changer one has in their car. Eventually you get tired of listening to the same cd over and over and you just want to get rid of it and add a new one. I have the same problem with the ladies. (I'm not bragging by the way I'm not exactly banging 5 Heidi Klums) So now Vulva has given me a simple solution. If I want to get rid of one, I spray this shit all over me before a date. Eventually they would clue on that I either have a weird fetish or I've been banging someone before the date. That's when I say "sorry I know I told you I was committed and ready to marry you because I love you but I am not a one women guy." Then I get the fuck out before the tears flow. Surely I could just be honest with them but I'll leave the honesty for Nuns. Vulva, you just helped the break-up process ten-fold.
Recapping the Night: Everything wrong once again minus a push. However with the Raptor game 93-97 late in the 4th I could see it slipping and we bet $2000 on the -350 on the Blazers. This isn't exactly fucking ideal and one day we'll get burned but insted of losing $600 by my fucked up picks all we lost was $28.57 overall we're at $1069.21. Rainy days I'll leave my March Madness picks today but I'll add more throughout the week if I like anything.
May the winners be ours. Taking over the world one step at a time. Incase you haven't gotten the memo my name is Julius James and I'm the fucking shit.
1 comment:
i had a bad sunday as well
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