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Sunday, February 28, 2010

Another Illusion: Talent

I had a million and one things I needed to do today. Cleaning, assignments, working-out, it's as though my day was just going to be a huge commotion. Instead, the black in me told me to say "Fuck it" and do what I love to do, sit on the couch gambling on sports and doing fuck all. Today, through the 15 hours of tv I watched I noticed something re-occuring that annoys me. A lot of television is filled with no-talent personalities that continuously pollute our screens. It pisses me off to realize I'd do a better job on the television than most of the people I watch. Thus, here are some people on television that need to hit the unemployment line, hurry, hard.

Nancy Grace: This loudmouth gorilla needs to get the fuck off my screen. Back in the day she used to have a weird sex appeal about her. (You're reading this from a guy who didn't flinch while watching 2 girls 1 cup.) Nancy who has a horrible, forced Southern accent gets an audience because she is a loud cunt that guys just want to fuck in order to shut her up. You're not saving the world Mrs. Grace, your ruining it.

Pierre McGuire: The hockey guy for TSN and NBC, Pierre McGuire makes an already tough sport to watch, unbareable. If he had the chance, Pierre would say fuck the game and just talk about how awesome he is for two and a half hours. He shares no insight whatsoever despite being right next to both hockey benches. Pierre your terrible and I hope soon enough the world agrees with me and soon you'll be reporting from the Westminster Dog Show.

Everyone who works at CNN except Robin Meade: Today, as you all probably know there was an Earthquake in Chile which was expected to bring a tsunami to Hawaii. For the entire day CNN had their cameras fixated on the shores of Hawaii and even brought in experts to assess the situation. Once the expert revealed nothing big was going to happen, the reporters at CNN got upset and started screaming at him, forcing him to tell the viewers a massive wave was going to wipe out North America. The end result? A 3ft 2 inch wave.

Jamie Campbell: I thought once he got demoted from Blue-Jays play by play announcer to calling the Olympics maybe he'd learn some of his mistakes and actually improve. I was fucking wrong. His shitty voice along with the fact he has a "Joe Rogan" approach (it sounds like he's wanking to whatever he's watching)makes him terrible. The fact of the matter is, Jamie Campbell sucks. He's not going to improve, he's not going to realize his mistakes, he's just going to suck the rest of his life.

MTV VJs: In the 90s video jockeys were employed to introduce music videos to the world. Sounds simple enough doesn't it? However it's 2010 and there are no more music videos or good music for that matter. So one would think this job would become obsolete? Nope. MTV VJs will sit on some fancy couch and analyze a 30 minute show with70 crying fat females with acne and bad hygene along with 10 males all over the ages of 35 but dress like they're 18 trying to get some action. These VJs talk about nothing at all. Seriously why the fuck are people getting paid for this shit?

Recapping the night: When you have 2300 circulating often times it's either going to be real good or real bad. Only JJ knows how he could possibly gamble 2300 and come out with a loss of $11. I can't even get mad, all I can do is shake my head. $108.64 overall. I feel like a turtle stuck in its shell. Only a matter of time before something happens. Stick around to find out.

May the winners be ours. Taking over the world one step at a time. Incase you haven't gotten the memo my name is Julius James and I'm the fucking shit.

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Saturday, February 27, 2010

Let's all pay Wikipedia

Chances are, at one point or another in your life you have used wikipedia. Whether it be for sports, history, or information on aiments, wikipedia has everything. That's where the story begins. Today I wanted a picture of Cheryl Bernard. I wanted to show the dick-riders who would allow her to piss in their mouth that she really has a bird-beak for a nose and an upclose picture could almost be as traumatizing as finding out the chick you were digging at the club was just a well disguised Tranny. I check out Wikipedia and the first thing that strikes me is the fact that their founder is looking for $6 million in donations in order to keep the site up and running. He looked more pathetic than me on Monday Nights glued to the tv watching MTV's The Hills. He went on and on about how Wikipedia only has 35 employees but the costs to run the thing are through the roof.

Who the fuck does this guy think he is? Haiti? Why the fuck should I donate to your company when I could write and have written information for your site in the past? I understand bandwidth costs are increasing but 6 Million dollars for shit written by anyone with an access to a computer? Please. The amount of times I've vandalized, I mean contributed valuable information to wikipedia,I suggest they break me off some of the $6 million they will inevitably receive. Hold up a quick second wikipedia, I've received countless failing marks for plagiarizing as a teen because of your site and now you want me to fucking pay you? Any information you want you could find on the net so why should I pay you for shit that anyone could have wrote? A site with no accountability and hardly any validity wants people to pay them to stay up and running.

I wonder if they've ever heard of ad revenue? You'll see more advertisements on my site than you will on wikipedia. Seriously, have we become that desperate that we need wikipedia to get us through our daily lives. I'll admit it may become a bit of an inconvience without Wikipedia around but for fuck sakes when wikipedia starts begging for money so they could go get high-class strippers and stay in over-priced suites in Dubai and they receive what they're asking for then the world is full of stupid folks. We need to come to the realization that we're too dependant on the internet. Wikipedia pages are written by 40 year old virgins, teens with crazy acne who have no chance of getting laid and Mexicans who want to feel important. Yet the owners want $6 million because they provide such a valuable service. Unless I'm busting a nut to content on your site, or making money then your site isn't valuable at all and you won't be seeing a dime. There are 6million better ways to spend money as opposed to giving it to wikipedia. Make the world a better place and tell wikipedia to eat a dick with herpes.

Recapping the Night: Shitty day in my "real" world. Shitty night in the "gambling" world. But fuck it I never complain I'm going to dust this off and hit it harder than ever tomorrow. I can't wait til this fucking Olympics is over with each hockey game that passes by my asshole just gets stretched more and more. $1500 in bets today, the return was $1379.69. That gives us a daily loss of $120.31 and overal we're sitting at a profit of $119.64.

May the winners be ours. Taking over the world one step at a time. Incase you haven't gotten the memo my name is Julius James and I'm the fucking shit.

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Friday, February 26, 2010

White people, You Folks need Help

Now I know I've defended you guys in the past but upon further review I think all you folks need some serious help. We all get that you run the world and have authority over us but seriously, you are some pretty fucked up people. I don't have  many encounters with white folks but over the past week due to certain circumstances I have been around them for a good part of my day. Damn you folks are fucking crazy. My neighbour's father passed away and we're pretty tight so I headed over to the viewing on Thursday Night. I hate to sound like Chris Rock and make this a black/white thing but from the 100 Caribbean funerals I've attended (ya we don't live long) the one thing  that's common is the crying. We'll fucking cry for days like we just had our cocks ripped off and stuck up our asses. I'll admit Caribbean people love to pound back the alcohol at these things and one thing that is always certain is the gossip spreading around (even about the dead person) and the crying is quite common.

I walked into the funeral home and entered the room and everybody is having a laugh and talking about hockey. What the fuck didn't somebody just die a few days ago? The first thing I hear is "Oh Pronger has to go." There's a dead man lying there in a big box yet all everyone is talking about is fucking hockey. That's when I realized this was some fucked up shit. I walk around, hug the family, scout for any potential fine ass, I mean pay my respects and I hear something in the background. It sounds familiar so I walked closer to the noise and I couldn't believe my ears. Boy George's "Karma Chameleon" was blasting from one of thise IPOD docking stations. So the rational part of me said maybe the dead dude liked this song so I ask the deceased's Grandson if this was one of the songs his grandfather really enjoyed. Nope, they just thought it would ease the tension if they played Boy George at a funeral viewing.

What the fuck is wrong with you folks. You got some fly chicks, growing up u never got a belt to your ass and you make a tonne of money. Yet you act all weird in settings where even black people act normal. At the "reception" of the funeral where everyone grabs a quick bite and just chills out they all bitched about how the service was too long and they were missing the Olympics. I could understand if a new-age version of Hitler died everyone would be disinterested but white folks are funny like that. They'll complain about things like Hot Dogs not having enough ketchup (when it's served at their Sunday dinners) They'll call the city to complain  when the garbage collection was a few hours late and they'll dance the "Macarena" at every party and they'll call it the greatest party every because of that shitty song. They all drink that nasty domestic beer and Don Cherry is their Jesus Christ. They get real patriotic on Canada Day and complain the other 364 days for the year. After closely assessing "your kind" you're no different than the Mexicans, Asians, and blacks. You're fucked up just like everybody else.

Recapping the Night: Shaking the rust off we finally hit it and we hit ir pretty hard. Let's hope we continue this hot streak. $1725 wagered, $2337.68 returned. That gives us a profit of $612.68. Overal we're sitting at a profit of $239.95.

May the winners be ours. Taking over the world one step at a time. Incase you haven't gotten the memo my name is Julius James and I'm the fucking shit.

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Thursday, February 25, 2010

Johnny Queer, A Genius.

I'll come off as a hypocrite because I don't really like faggots ( no, they are not conisidered gays in my book) and I may be the only one in the world who feels this way but I seriously think Johnny Weir isn't gay. If you don't know who I'm talking about, a figure skater who acts like a chick and is always some controversy because of his fashion, his style, and just the general way he acts. On the outside he looks like a gay, annoying, attention-craving piece of shit but I actually think he's a genius. He's never come out and actually said he's gay. He's never been spotted with other dudes. He doesn't go around talking about other men. The only thing wrong with Johnny Weir (who sometimes likes to say Queer) is the fact that he looks, talks, and walks exactly like a chick. Okay I admit it's a big fucking problem but for this figure skater who isn't anything special he's created something out of nothing and it's the way he makes a living, nothing wrong with that.

I'm not here to defend gays or support them but Johnny Weir isn't exactly the Lebron James of speed-skating. ( If you're suprised that I watch this shit then so am I, tv is dead these days) He's placed mid table results and will go home with zero medals. Yet he's the one person everybody is talking about. Everyone is quick to judge the guy and yet he dances to Frank Sinatra's classic "My Way" and does his own thing. He wears whatever the fuck he wants to wear, he acts however the fuck he wants to act and he hasn't done shit to please anybody. I'm not using him as an example but the world is filled with judgemental fucks who walk around with a broken gavel. Johnny Weir could very well be a gay dude who goes home to a bunch of queers everynight but it's amazing how many people are trully affected by him. He isn't even fucking good at what he does. The fact that Johnny Weir could cause such commotion about personal identity (emphasis on the word personal) shows how fucked up we as people are.

I think the guy is doing it as in act and at the end of the day he goes home and does coke off hot model's tits. He has the gay support on his side (and they're the ones with all the money) and he's making a living. The fact that everyone is pissed off because he does whatever the fuck he does is great because he doesn't give a fuck and neither should you. The guy makes a killing because he's "perceived" to be gay and at the end of the day he probably wipes his ass with hundred dollar bills. He could go home and blast Ease-E and do a line and live his life yet everybody and their mother will still be hating him because they think he's an ass fucking queer. The truth of the matter is he has made a decent living  and gotten people to talk about him despite the fact that he has no real figure skating talent and this is what makes Johnny Weir a genius.

Recapping the Night: I could roll out a list of excuses but I won't. Betting with my heart and not my head. Too  My fault I was too fucking ignorant tonight and it cost me. Sitting at a loss off $372.73 is not where I want to be first day of the new system but it is what it is. If the Sweden/Slovakia game changes then I'll adjust the numbers but right now they're down 3-2 going into the 3rd and it's not looking good. These days you'd probably make more money betting against whatever I say haha so I'd even suggest that right now. It's all good though time to make it back. I'll release my picks tomorrow and I'll continue to add throughout the day.

May the winners be ours. Taking over the world one step at a time. Incase you haven't gotten the memo my name is Julius James and I'm the fucking shit.

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Would You Like Fries With That?

What the fuck is the point of post-secondary education? I'm becoming increasingly aware that my life is shaping up to be like the man here on the left.  The chances of me working at McDonalds serving super-sized fries to fat people who look worse than me, get laid more, and make more money is increasingly likely. I'm currently  getting a triple minor ( I found a loop-hole) in History, Philosophy, and English at the University of Toronto. I'm not questioning the value of the material that I learn because I know that everything I learned from the past 3 years in University has been very valuable. At the same time this shit is going to get me no where. "Hey boss I don't know how to make money for your company but I could tell you that our knowledge is obtained via experience and there is no knowledge that we are born with." I've come to the realization that I just may have possible blown 25k on a piece of paper I'll never be able to use.

For the last 3 years I've gotten some shitty grades, learned nothing that could help me in the "outside" world, and spent a tonne of time jerking off to Daisy Marie (google her). At a rate of about $5500 per year and then we have to add in books so let's say $6200 per year. Calculating travel let's say $90 a month, $720 for the year. I blow $7 grand a year and I'm going to end up doing fuck all with my life. What happened to the good old days where I didn't need the piece of paper to get a job. Post-Secondary education, Fuck You. However it's not only me. I see economic and marketing students who have spent years upon years in writing down formulas and solving them. Yup those formulas will definitely help you make money in the future. For fuck sakes why couldn't this shit be universal. Classes should be labeled How to Make Money 101 and then seperate it depending on the subject. So there would be How to Make Money English, How to Make Money Geography and so forth. Instead we go into school each day spending hours upon hours on shit that will leave us homeless alcoholics serving fries at McDonalds.

By now you're probably laughing at me thinking damn he's fucked. Yup, well just know this, 60% of tax-payers money paid my tuition this year. Take that suckas. So while I'm in school busting my ass off learning about shit that won't help pay my mortgage or car payments but will help me debate with other people just know that you paid for 60% of that. If I was good with my hands (get your mind out of the gutter) I'd go do some trade work. If I was any good at math I'd get some bullshit business degree and work in some large firm making 6 figures and sleeping with high-class prositutes instead of the trailor-trash std ones I sleep with now. Instead I'll continue to piss my life away, graduate in a year and a half and make minimum wage at McDonalds while continue living in my parents basement having my mom pack my lunch for me and give me a Crispy Crunch and a kiss as I head out the door. Wait a second, this life isn't bad at all.

Houston we have a problem: The following is or my degenerate friends who are just as crazy as I am.

This only pertains to the 15 or so that I know who follow my picks religiously. The system is more flawed than Enron. It started with a few picks, then you wanted more so I gave you more (no homo). Now if I could pick winners straight up we wouldn't be having this conversation but for fuck sakes I'm amateur. As you guys know even when we lose money, we play the late night ones and end up either breaking-even, softening the blow or even making profit. The last few days we've had a problem in communication. We've gotten beaten down, then at about midnight the other night I played Sweden +138 at a high amount and won everything back. The same thing happened the other night when I laid $2200 down in Australia in cricket at about 2am and made a profit despite having a 1-9 night. Now, I send out text messages, emails, post them on RPB, Morency, and I handle them on msn but I can't do that all in a timely fashion. I'm aware that 15 of you are playing my picks and for the most part 13 of you get the messages in time and we all end up doing fine. However there are about 2 of you who aren't getting the information and just getting beaten down like that black dude on the Oakland  bus. Then I have to deal with the emails and texts about how your losing money and I don't feel like dodging bullets in Scarborough. I tried to do the pastebin thing but it just wasn't working and it's still a mess.

New System:

From now in everything gets listed at the top right of the blog. The amount wagered, the team, the line, the odds, the possible return. Here's the key: The board will get updated throughout the day so keep checking back in. I'm going to set a cut off time at Midnight so If you're down and want to make it back check out the board throughout the day and see what everyone else is playing. At the end of each night I will recap the numbers here in a "Recapping the Night" section and everything will be out in the open. I'm scrapping the record system because what's the point of having a record when we could go 1-9 the other night and still come out with profit (though that fucking cricket game was nerve-wrecking). So hopefully this system works better than the last and I don't have to pick up my phone with you cunts yelling at me wondering why did so and so make money yet you got raped.

May the winners be ours. Taking over the world one step at a time. Incase you haven't gotten the memo my name is Julius James and I'm the fucking shit.

Tuesday, February 23, 2010

Under Construction

In an effort to make things better I have to change a few things. Instead of your usual morning read it will be postponed by a few hours. Check it out by 1pmTuesday for the new entry, changes and hopefully better look. Stay safe.

The Hottest Chicks in the World

I'm pretty certain that my following is 99% sausage. (Most ladies can't deal with this non-sensitive shit) So men, we've spent hours contemplating where the hottest chicks are located. Scientific studies have been done regarding the origination of attractive people, historic evidence has been gathered to try and solve the question and still in 2010 we have no answer. Where do the hottest bitches come from? I fucking solved it. The answer doesn't come in a geographical form, it comes in the form of religion. The hottest chicks in the world are....wait for it.......Muslim people. Ya the terrorist people we berate everyday are hands down the hottest people this world has to offer. They give the most pleasure, they are the most attractive and they have the best sex. In order for me to explain how I arrived at this conclusion I'm going to have to break it down for you. First off, when I say Muslim, I don't mean any terrorist bitch off the street, I mean the chicks who wear the veil that covers their entire face except the eyes.

In my first year of university I was in a small Philosophy class and I was always the first to enter the room along with this Muslim chick with the full-on face gear. Looked like she was about to rob a bank. The class was so fucking boring I just thought about what the hell was under that veil, was she hot? was she not, was she a tranny? After me consistantly bugging her about 8 weeks after she decided to show me her face. It's amazing to think that the anticipation of seeing someone's face was like I had just fucked Megan Fox. I felt like I climbed Mt. Everest, out-lapped Usain Bolt, and scored a World-Cup goal. The anticipation of seeing that chick's face (which by the way was pretty decent) was just as good as sex. Fuck you Cash Warren, so what you get to fuck Jessica Alba on an on-demand basis, you haven't gotten a Muslim chick to un-veil herself for you. I realize that Muslims provide the greatest sex, without ever having sex. Unreal.

Looking at the veil has a great effect on what you think is behind it. The sky is the limit. A Muslim hoe, is whatever you want her to be. Halle Berry? No problem. Chris Crocker ( if that's your thing) No problem. The versatility of that veil allows for the imagination to run wild. This is what makes Muslim hoes the hottest in the world. Edit: After just reading what I wrote so far I realized I'm more fucked up than I imagined. I just posted a crock of shit. My ideology of the hottest females in the world is based on imagination. What the fuck? I can get that sort of pleasure from a blow-up doll. Fuck you Arabs for fooling me with that veil shit. You aren't the hottest in the world, what the fuck was I thinking. The hottest bitches in the world is all up to the individual and in my case I definitely have the best girl in the world. Her first name is Left and her last name is Hand.

Recapping Picks: You know followers, you people are some bitch-asses. When I was fucking hitting them out of the park in January I had a decent following. Now that I'm fucking up the people viewing my blog has sky-rocketed. You love seeing me lose! It's all gravy I still love you (no homo) I'm going to make up what I lost today by slamming cricket ( if I lose this match I'm as dead as Rich Hansen's sex life) An ugly ugly ugly 2-9 on the night and 58-65 on the year. Thank you Canada's female hockey team. You beat the shit out of everyone up to this game then played like ass. Everything went wrong. I'll bounce back.

Today's Picks:

May the winners be ours. Taking over the world one step at a time. Incase you haven't gotten the memo my name is Julius James and I'm the fucking shit.

Monday, February 22, 2010

Take That Suckas

I'm not Anti-Canada. I love this country Scarborough with all my heart. However, what I witnessed today was trully fantastic. Almost everybody living in this country has the same ideology that their child is going to be a hockey superstar and play in the NHL. These idiot parents  spend thousands on their kid who is complete shit in an effort to make their dreams come true. It isn't just living a dream, it's a lifestyle. Waking up at 6am, going to Tim Hortons, getting the same fucking drink you get every Saturday morning and hitting the rink to push Little Jimmy to become the next Sidney Crosby, Alexander Ovechkin. Millions of dollars get poured into these hockey programs while neglecting other programs such as soccer, volleyball, basketball, baseball etc. Every sport in this country takes a back seat to hockey and we as citizens suffer everyday.

90% of the sports shows on television somehow pertains to hockey. Bars all across the city will refuse to show certain sporting events because the Leafs game takes top priority. The radio is filled with sports analysts discussing anything from a player's stats to the size of his last turd. It's ridiculously over-done. However, today the good guys got their payback. You spend all the fucking money in the world developing programs for hockey. You shove this shit up everyone's ass giving parents the false sense of hope that their child is a star so they could continue to fund the team. Then you give us Team Canada. Last night it was impossible to find a reasonably priced ticket if you were in Vancouver trying to get a ticket to the game. It was impossible to get a bar, anywhere that was going to show NBA. I'm sure more people watched the hockey game than they did the Superbowl. The result? The team that didn't give a fuck beat the team that triesd their ass off.

I'm sick of having to put up with this hockey bullshit. Today, watching that Canadian defender get outskated and watching the diving American score the empty netter was justice being served. The saying is indeed true, revenge is sweeter than pussy. I'm not a hockey-hater, nor will I berate those who enjoy the sport. However, Canada overdoes the fucking sport to death and watching the arena die when that puck went in the net was nothing short of amazing. If Canada had won the game there would have been talk about it until 2012 when the world supposedly blows up. The tv would have been filled with "experts" who would analyze every minute of the game. Instead Canada gets the "oh well they tried" treatment. 90% of Americans don't give a fuck about olympic hockey and tommorow will be just another day for them. Tomorrow, I will have to get up and turn on Espn to see the panel of experts dissect the Canadian hockey team. All their analysis could be summed up in two words. "They suck"

Recapping Betting Picks: Another nasty day but it was looking beyond nasty. So I'll take the small loss and move on. 4-6 on the day and 56-56 on the month.

Some Changes: Brace yourself this will be a long one.

Today, as I usually do once a month I got my accountant to handle things for me. We arrived at the conclusion that were down $240 all in all and my original calculations were wrong. Yet, my bankroll continues to grow. Fucking weird but that's why I let Indians do my math for me. The problem was I wasn't calculating the odds properly etc etc. So I started thinking, maybe I should release my entire betting picks for each day. The one issue is the fact that the odds are never universal and I'm not going to calculate it each night or tell you how to bet. From now on I'm taking down the earnings tab. ( Yes I know I'm technically down 240) but instead I will reveal everything I bet for the day. My hard-core followers will bet every single one of my picks and as you already know, we make money. If you see something you don't understand just leave a comment and I'll address it. We bet  on everything so the earnings could never be calculated correctly unless I calculated it everyday and I don't. As long as we make money, it's all gravy. I'm not going to tell you how to wager each pick (sometimes there are like 20 picks in a day) however you should do it responsibly and watch the odds. Because I'll be dropping a tonne of pics daily I'll be doing it from a hosting site so from now on there will be a link where you click and get my picks. I know this sounds complicated but like someone told me today, we're making money and you should be doing the same. Another minor issue is that I make the majority of my bets somewhere between 11pm-3am therefore the lines I chose and the ones you may choose might be slightly different. Shouldn't be a major issue though the majority stay the same

Today's Picks:

May the winners be ours. Taking over the world one step at a time. Incase you haven't gotten the memo my name is Julius James and I'm the fucking shit.

Sunday, February 21, 2010

Why All The Hate

Almost everything I say is offensive. However, a few weeks ago I said something that ruffled more than a few feathers/ (by the way I'm pretty buzzing and it's like 3am so if this is heart to read I apologize in advance) The direct quote that has everybody in a mess is the fact that I said the "Jews run the world." I could tell you that after 7 weeks of doing this blog someone has taken offence to almost every one of my blog entries, however that specific line has gotten the most buzz. For whatever reason, whatever I said was highly controversial and I'm going to address it in today's entry. Why is there so much fucking hate for a bunch of people that have had to tolerate everybody else for the past 100 years? There are a bunch of other assholes fucking up the world such as terrorists, faggots, Black Eyed Peas but yet everyone and there mother seems to carry a hard-on for the Jews. What the fuck am I missing.

Did a Jew rape everybody's mother and give everyone's sister Aids? I'm trying to understand why everytime 3 letters in a specific combination gets revealed to the world, everyone becomes all defensive and hate spills from their mouths. What the fuck did these people ever do to you? Yes many of the stereotypes that hand around them are true, they have large noses, they penny pinch, and they stick to their own. Is giving up morals you had for money such a terrible thing? If everybody did it there would be a lot less bitching and complaining. Depending on whatever book you read the Jews either killed or saved Jesus, is shit that happened 2000 years ago the reason everyone hates them. I'll stress that I'm not sympathetic to this religious group but I'm asking these questions because I'm trying to understand why the fuck does everybody hate them. Many often complain that they stay segregated. Do you like to mix and match with people from various cultures.

If I had 4 Latinos over at my house everyday I'd walk around with a loaded gun. If I had close contact with people from the Middle East I'd be looking for evidence that depict terrorist. What's so wrong with stickig to your own kind. I could understand the fact that people hate Isreal because America supports them in everything but why do people give a fuck that their bossing around a bunch of Middle East terrorists. They make amazing bagels and have some fly women I'll never get the chance to fuck. Is that enough reason to hate them. These people were all stuck in Pizza Pizza-like ovens and burnt or gassed up my a crazy genius yet everybody hates them. Shouldn't we hate Germans for their fucked up skin-head associations? The English for ruling the world with their crooked ass teeth and ugly women, Nigerians for exploiting millions of people with their bullshit lottery scams. Once again I don't sympathize with people from Isreal or Jews I'm just trying to understand why everyone and their mother hates them like they just seen a naked picture of Rosie O Donnell.

Recapping Picks: I learned a few things today. A) I should stop complaing. B) Despite the Olympics not being over I laid $75 on USA to win total medals at +900 and it's looking good ( though I feel sorry for those of you who bet my picks daily) c) I should stop fucking with UFC. Is this rock bottom? Is the worse yet to come? Who the fuck knows. Let's just keep it rolling and make back what's ours after wasting fucking too much money on UFC. 3-6 on the day and 52-50 on the month. quote Christian Bale: "For FUCK sakes I'm amateur."

Today's Picks: I'm not going to change shit. Beating the hell out of this board.

Villanova vs Pittsburgh..................................Villanova -1.5
Marquette vs Cincy......................................Marquette +1.5
Cleveland Cavs vs Orlando Magic................Cavs +2
Boston Celtics vs Denver Nuggets................Celtics +4
Memphis Grizzlies vs NJ Nets......................Grizzlies -4.5
Houston Rockets vs New Orleans Hornets...Rockets +2
Atlanta Hawks vs Golden State....................Hawks -5
Utah Jazz vs Portland Trailblazers.................Jazz -1
Canada vs USA...........................................Under 5.5
Sweden vs Finland......................................... Sweden -.5 (+135)

May the winners be ours. Taking over the world one step at a time. Incase you haven't gotten the memo my name is Julius James and I'm the fucking shit.

Saturday, February 20, 2010

The Real Apology

Below is the official first draft of Tiger Woods' apology. This was what he had planned to say before his people got hold of it and edited the shit out of it. Enjoy:

Ladies and Gentlemen, I've come today before you to ask for your forgiveness. The truth of the matter is, my Swedish wife may be sexy on the outside but she's a bitter cunt on the inside. Oh and she also has a putrid pussy. I'm deeply sorry for the fact that I cheated on her with various forms of life which include females, transexuals, animals, and I even did a cactus one time in Nevada. Elin, who was a nanny before I met her ass, has forced me to show some respect and this is exactly what I plan to do. I will no longer stick my cock into ugly looking pornstars, old British women and waitresses at Perkins. Instead I will try to be more like my role-model, my late father Earl Woods. Oh nevermind I forgot he cheated as well. To the media who I blame for causing me to cheat, fuck you. I cannot stress enough that this matter is between me, my wife and the 384 women I cheated with and I can't forget the cactus. For the 5 friends that have come today to support me, I'm forever grateful. Nevermind 4 of them are security guards and the other is my mother.

I was digging around the house because Elin refuses to fuck me and I came across Buddhism and its doctrines. Before getting caught I didn't give a fuck about religion but now that I've been subjected to humility and suffering, I'm thankful that I have found religion because it will help me keep my dick in my pants. Despite currently having a boner because I'm imagining Star Jones naked, I think my actions will show that I could be a changed man and I'm ready to win my fans back. Oh and even though this has nothing to do with anything, let me mention that I have helped 3 negros find education in the Washington D.C. area. The Tiger Woods Foundation reaches out to kids in impoverished areas where they need the help most. Places like Laguna Beach, California, Hartford, Connecticut and Augusta, Maine have all benefited greatly from the foundation because let's face it, it's very difficult to achieve anything in those ghetto-ass areas.

I'd like you all to know that tomorrow I will continue to receive treatment for an addiction I don't have. In therapy I have learned to masturbate without porn and it's a great skill that I will be able to apply without therapy. To my PGA friends on tour who wish I were dead or raped by a big black guy, I thank you for allowing me to take the spotlight away from you so I could issue an apology I really don't mean. To my mother, who I once tried to have sex with, I'm sorry for letting you down and not obeying the rules you and my cheating father instilled in me. Before I go I want the media to understand that despite my wife beating my ass with a golf-club and smashing my face, we have never had a domestic assault incident during our relationship and everything you print is false. Have a great day.

P.S: Fuck you Rachel Uchitel

Recapping Picks: I'm going to go head and count my blessings. I know a lot of you wagered big on my picks last night and glad we came out of that with no scratches. After starting the night 0-3, we found composure and ended the night 4-4. 53-48 on the month.

Today's Picks: Check back throughout the day incase I add anymore.

Charlotte Bobcats vs Milwaukee Bucks........Bobcats +2.5
Tennessee vs South Carolina.........................Tenn -2
Wake Forest vs NC State...............................Wake Forest -2
Buffalo vs St Peters.........................................Buffalo +1.5
Kentucky vs Vanderbelt..................................Kentucky +1
Nogueira vs Cain......(UFC)...........................Nogueira -110
Jardine vs Badar............................................Jardine +125
Bonnar vs Soszynski......................................Bonnar +150
Sacramento Kings vs LA Clippers......................Kings +1

May the winners be ours. Taking over the world one step at a time. Incase you haven't gotten the memo my name is Julius James and I'm the fucking shit.

Friday, February 19, 2010

Everything is Bigger in Texas, Including Idiots

I spent a good portion of today analyzing a discussion on a forum ( I know I know) where they discussed whether or not the asswipe who flew a plane into the IRS building was a "terrorist" or not. In the end it came down to race and how America is "stupid" and blah blah you know the typical Canadian bullshit but I was really intrigued by the dude's suicide letter. If you don't know who I'm talking about, some software engineer guy hopped on a plane and ran it into an IRS building. My initial reaction was, oh well one less idiot in the world to deal with but after spending some time on it I'm fucking baffled. Why is Texas full of retarded people? A guy wants to get back at the government so what does he do? Fly a plane into a government building and killed himself. Yup that really showed them.

See on the outside it isn't that big of a deal but for the past couple of years I've had to deal with someone from Austin, Texas until I recently severed ties and I'm starting to think the whole entire state is useless. The one man to come out of your state ruined the entire fucking country. Your most famous for executing people and the most famous thing you've given us as of late is the big ass stadium in Arlington and the obese Jessica Simpson. The fucking state is filled with fence-hopping Mexicans who post up in parking-lots at Home Depot thinking work is going to miraculously come to them. Your among the Nations worst when it comes to having a high-school diploma over 25 and 47th in SAT scores. But how about dem Cowboys? However Texas I have to give credit where credit is due, you showed the world exactly how to run a successful business, gou have us Enron.

I could go on for days about how shitty Texas is but I want to zero-in on Joe Stack (no not the name of a hamburger at BK) the guy who killed himself fucking up that IRS building. In his suicide he constantly bitches at the government for being lazy and stupid and blah blah. Flying your plane into a building where people are trying to make a living and just doing their job wasn't the way to go Joe Stack. You should have just done things the "black way." Sit at home playing Solitare or Free Cell (because Verizon doesn't really like giving Internet to black people) and fucking away life without working a decent days work, ever. While your at it have a bunch of kids that you can't afford and have no intention to take care of them. Then in your leisure time roll a blunt and listen to Bone Thugs and Harmony. Or Joe Stack you could have done the most obvious option when you felt like sticking it to the govt and just DONT PAY TAXES. So what if you end up like Wesley Snipes or the faggot from Survivor at least you stuck it to the man. "Well IRS Man, let's try something different....take a pound of my flesh and sleep well." - taken from his suicide note.  I can assure you Joe Stack, while you're getting your asshole picked by maggots, they're sleeping just fine. 

Read Joe Stack's Bible of a letter here:

Recapping the Picks: Shouldn't have stuck my hand in Olympics so I deserve the .500 night again. I'm doing okay actually weathering this shitty ass story. Lord Gamblor, I don't live in England, please let me see some sun. 4-4 again and 49-44 on the month.

Today's Picks: Check for more as the day progressess but I'm riding away teams:

Denver Nuggets vs Washington Wizards....................Nuggets -6
Cleveland Cavs vs Charlotte Bobcats.........................Cavs -3.5
SA Spurs vs Philadelphia 76ers..................................Spurs -3
Detriot vs Milwaukee Bucks..............................Pistons (pick)
Dallas Mavs vs Orlando Magic..................................Mavs +6
Chicago Bulls vs Minnesota T-Wolves.......................Bulls -2.5
Toronto Raptors vs New Jersey Nets........................Raptors -2
Boston Celtics vs Portland Trailblazers.......................Celtics +3

May the winners be ours. Taking over the world one step at a time. Incase you haven't gotten the memo my name is Julius James and I'm the fucking shit.

Thursday, February 18, 2010

We're So Much More than America's Little Brother

It's no suprise that Americans for the most part are a bunch of Elitists. (If you don't know what it means look it up...I'm talking to you Scarborough) However, for a country whose main identity has been to differentiate with America, I've begin to realize in the last little bit that they hold the same fucking shitty elitist attitude that most Americans have. Canada spends all it's time telling people that they are not the USA. Just check out the "Joe Canada" commercials Molson gives us. They love harping on the fact the they aren't associated with the USA and have their own identity. Yet all Canadians ever fucking talk about how great they are, at least the Americans to a certain extent back their shit up.

I'm sitting here watching the Olympics (ya as you can tell it was another shitty gambling night) and there are two Canadians in the final speed skating race. The Chinese chick beat the living shit out of her competition and the ugly Canadian bitch came second. Instead of talking about the great performance the Chinese chick put on, everyone and their mother went on about how great it was to get that Silver. Why the fuck did that ugly platypus looking Canadian bitch take a victory lap and start crying, her ass didn't win. Then I see Shaun White put on a once in a lifetime performance. I was watching this "Hashpipe" event and I thought it was pretty fucking cool until Shaun White came in and made the thing incredible. The air and just the way he raped the pipe it was trully amazing to watch. However as soon as it was over fucking CTV switched so they could have an interview with the Platypus bitch who got smoked by the Chinese lady. The female hockey team which is no doubt a strong team i beating teams 18-0 (teams who could barely skate) and they still celebrate each goal pretending their competition isn't a bunch of Special Ed. kids

Canada, lets face it, you are no fucking different than the Americans you try to dissassociate yourself with every fucking day. You scream about the free Health-care but I've waited 14 hours in Emergency with a broken hand. You scream about how great Canada is yet there are only 3 cities in the whole fucking country anyone with the right sense of mind would want to live in. Your own National soccer team uses Qwest Field as their national soccer stadium. You've given the world Nickleback, Avril Lavigne, and Bryan Adams....even Jim Carrey pretends you don't exist. Your football league which you rant and rave about has 8 teams and 7 owners...figure that one out. You got oil sands that you can't extract, women who are stuck-up assclowns (except those from Montreal) and anyone with real talent heads down south so they can make a life for themselves. Thank God for Terry Fox, oh wait he cancels out when you consider what KD Lang has done for the reputation of this country.

Recapping Picks: Fuck. No loss no gain though I should have fucking won that Duke game.4-4 on the night and 45-40 on the month. Lord Gamblor as some people like to call him owes me.

Today's Picks:

Syracuse vs Georgetown...................Syracuse +2
Denver Nuggets vs Cleveland Cavs...Nuggets +6
Wisconsin vs Minnesota....................Wisconsin +1.5
California vs Oregon St....................California -6
St. Marys vs San Diego St................St Marys -7
Pittsburgh vs Marquette..........................Pittsburgh +6.5
Canada vs Switzerland...........................Canada -4.5
Russia vs Slovakia.................................Russia -2.5
May the winners be ours. Taking over the world one step at a time. Incase you haven't gotten the memo my name is Julius James and I'm the fucking shit.

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

We're Losing 'Em.

If you're like me and for whatever reason you prefer the white vagina (though you know you'd never marry them) then we got a problem on our hands. Elin Nordegren (Tiger Woods' soon to be ex-wife) represented the last of a dying breed. For whatever reason there are a lot of dark skinned cats like myself who just prefer the white girls. It's coming to an end. Whether you like to admit or not, they aren't digging us as much as they once did and it's a terrible scene. If you grew up in a Caribbean household like myself then you'd understand why the weave, bold attitude, and infatuation with looking like Halle Berry or Beyonce is just too much to fucking handle all the time. It's refreshing to turn on the tv and see Miley,  Jo-Jo, Elisha Cuthbert do her thing. The white girls have been pleasing us for a long time but the writing was on the wall a long time ago.

The whole infatuation with white girls began in grade school when the boys realized those white girls have no shame. They will do anything and everything during sex. Vacuum cleaners, sybians, cucumbers, Tilex bottles, Ipod shuffles, swiffer broom handles, you name it and they've done it. However, it's 2010 and they've decided that they no longer want to swallow. What the fuck?? I've seen girls do some crazy shit but somehow, somewhere along the lines they've come to the conclusion that swallowing isn't cool. Spitters are for quitters and we all know that but not swallowing was the first sign that white girls have begun to stick to their own race. There once was a time when you could lie to her, forget her birthday, force her to have sex, and convince her that everyone was out to get her. They no longer fall for these things because these days they are actually taking their parents advice

We used to tell them bullshit stories about our lives in order to suck money from them. In other words we gave them a false sense of hope. " Oh honey I'm getting a recording deal next week." "Oh honey I have Division 1 scouts ready to offer me a contract" or in my low-ass achieving case: " Oh honey I'm moving up from bag boy to cashier." These lies no longer work and neither does the bullshit grades we were getting. We all know white girls have a safety net in their parents so they never gave a fuck about grades. You impressed them more by skipping class and getting Ds because they liked having a bad boy. The recession has caused their parents to force them to do well in school and thus our stupid asses are raking up Ds for no reason. (Lets face it even if we tried in school we'd still get Ds) I think the well has run dry. They've  started to stick to their own race and in turn forcing us to go back to those we dread. They say the grass is greener on the other side, all I see is dead patches and shitty soil.

Recapping Picks: No loss, no gain. Though it's starting to piss me off. Blah I know I know I need patience. 3-3 on the night and 41-36 on this cold ass February month.

Today's Picks: I'm going for broke, beating the hell out of this board. Check in throughout the day because I'm betting on everything I like:

Miami Heat vs NJ Nets............................Heat -6.5
Utah Jazz vs New Orleans Hornets...........Jazz -3.5
Phoenix Suns vs Dallas Mavs...................Suns +4.5
West Virginia vs Providence....................West Virginia -7
Duke vs Miami Florida............................Duke -7.5
Texas vs Missouri...................................Texas +2.5
Penn St. vs Northwestern........................Penn St. +7
Toronto Raptors vs Memphis Grizzlies......Under 217
May the winners be ours. Taking over the world one step at a time. Incase you haven't gotten the memo my name is Julius James and I'm the fucking shit.

Tuesday, February 16, 2010

Attempting to Save Humanity

In an effort to save money I've packed it in the last few weekends, decided to stay inside and just gamble my life away with my bankroll. Of course there are only so many horses you can bet on, sporting events you could get on, and skype sex you can have before you decide you need a break and focus on the tube. Over the last little bit I've been watching all-sorts of shit and today's entry will be a run down of shows that are a fucking waste of time. If you watch this shit you need to do what Chris Henry taught us best: jump out of a moving vehicle.

Hoarders: Is this what the world has come too? We get to view people who claim to be "sick" and they just keep collecting crap upon crap to the point where their house is barely livable. How the fuck does this weird shit interest people?

Mantracker: The concept is great, adult cops and robbers out in the wild. There's only one problem: Mantracker gets glorfied for having such great "skills" yet he's on a fucking horse. No shit, of course he's going to catch them. Have his ass follow 2 black people who have guns and then I'll applaud him for his great "skills"

24: I'm guilty of this one though I only do it because I've invested too much time into it already. Jack Bauer will get tortured, his wife/daughter/dog/friend will all get raped up the ass, he'll be faced with a problem impossible to solve, yet somehow every fucking episode he gets out of the jam. It's like over the last few years I've been watching the same shit over and over with the sense of hope that the next episode will be different, sounds like Leafs fans.

Two and A Half Men: Same shit different toilet. We get it, Charlie Sheen is a pimp and could tap anyone he chooses. Does it really need to be replicated each episode? It's a bad episode of Frasier that just repeats itself with no end. I'm hoping one of these days Charlie gets aids and dies, would make for a great Series Finale.

My Name Is Earl: I'm a big believer in karma but does it have to be depicted as explictly as its done on the show? Oh I robbed this trailor-park cunt 20 years ago so I better take my list and repent or else karma will be the reason a car knocks me out. While I'm at it what's the deal with Randy, he's more retarded than a grade 4 austistic class, combined.

Deal or No Deal: Mr. Washed up, I mean Howie hosts this gameshow with a great concept. The models are great and there are certain appealing things about the contestants. The only issue is the fact that the show's pace is slower than a 80 year old dude wanking. There are commercial breaks every 4.5 seconds, Howie annoys people within 4seconds, and I've never seen anyone win so what's the fucking point? Should be re-named to who wants to be a millionare 2.0.

Cabbie on the Street: If you're one of those people who watch the score to see Cabbie on the Street then there is no word to describe your life other than lame. Here's a dude that has gotten famous by touching people. His questions are stupid, his persona is stupid, and the concept of the show is stupid. However, because his fat Pillsbury Dough Boy self touches people his segments are seen as brilliant. If you enjoy those segments you have worse taste than a Dominos Pizza.

Survivorman: OLN does it again, more irrelevant programs for an irrelevant channel. If I wanted to watch someone drink their own urine I'd just google "fetish porn." Instead we get to witness a man, who is so infatuated with the outdoors, that he'll drink his own urine, feed off his nails, and put his body through a tremendous amount of pain to prove a point: You can Survive anywhere. After watching a few episodes I've arrived at the conclusion: I rather die.

Today's Picks: 38-33 on the month.

Miami Heat vs Philadelphia 76ers..............................Heat +2
Phoenix Suns vs Memphis Grizzlies...........................Suns +1
Dallas Mavs vs OKC Thunder..................................Mavs +3.5
Utah Jazz vs Houston Rockets..................................Jazz -2.5
Boston Celtics vs Sacramento Kings.........................Celtics -5.5
Cincy vs South Florida.............................................Cincy +2.5

May the winners be ours. Taking over the world one step at a time. Incase you haven't gotten the memo my name is Julius James and I'm the fucking shit.

Monday, February 15, 2010

Have no Fear The Government is Here

Forget the birth of Christ,  he Superbowl and the World Cup, the best day of 2010 is when those income tax cheques come in the mail. This blog will make me come off as hypocrite because I just pissed away $70 in slots ( It was a good thing I was starting to get addicted like the time I used to frequent bingo halls in grade 11) However ,at the casino I noticed a crazy amount of people blowing all sorts of loot. When I started asking around as to why the place was so packed (I know it's a long weekend but usually its just me and the Asians) they all replied with virtually the same responses. "It's tax time ," or "welfare came in."

Money management 101: If you don't have it don't spend it and no one I spoke too last night had the money they were spending. However I am not no economics teacher but it pisses me off that half of these assholes were blowing shit like welfare cheques etc. The day I got my first paycheque in this world I seen a bunch of money taken off by things that we're abbreviated. When I asked the payroll lady what the fuck is this shit she told me "oh it's taxes." Later on in life I realized that the money coming off my paycheque was being used to transport snow from Yukon to BC, to give political leaders a vaction in the middle of the year, and today I learned it was used to feed copulsive gamblers money so they could blow more. Some might consider me a compulsive gambler but all the money I've ever blown was money that I earned and used as disposable income. Collecting welfare/tax returns so you could go piss it away in the casino is fucking retarded.

This dumb shit isn't only specific to Canada. There were loads of people on twitter boasting about the fact that they were going to spend their return cash on the Superbowl or the ASG in Dallas. Half these people are black with kids who are wearing shoes 4 sizes too small. I'm just sayin'. I don't give a fuck how people spend their money but when it comes off my hard-earned money then I have every right to bitch. Apparently 1 in 8 children live in poverty here in Canada yet the pubs and casinos are all packed. Next year once again we'll all be getting raped in taxes especially here in Toronto meanwhile social assistance cases will go up and the casinos will still be raking it in. I've had enough with the Western World.  I think it's time to follow my dream and move to East Germany so I could open up a kosher store.

Recapping Picks: Shittyday everywhere fuck me. Horse racing. Broke Even. Slots down. Sports picks down. This shit works in bunches. Hoping for clear skies soon enough. 2-3 and 38-33 on the month.

Today's Picks: Nothing in the NBA world and the NCAA board sucks ass. Check back in you might see some Olympics stuff but I think I may take it easy toda We'll see.

May the winners be ours. Taking over the world one step at a time. Incase you haven't gotten the memo my name is Julius James and I'm the fucking shit.

Sunday, February 14, 2010

Ruining Life Piece by Piece

I'm big on history; I think history defines who we are today and could teach us to avoid many mistakes from the past. History is something that should never be imitated so when I seen the "We Are the World 25 for Haiti" a remake of the 1985 classic, I knew it was going to be trouble. If you haven't caught on yet check the youtube vid at the bottom of the post. Let's start with the day this shit was released, February 12th. Bitch please, the Haiti disaster occured on January 12th, nobody gives a fuck about them anymore. However it has been a real boring shitty weekend so why not just throw away 8 minutes of my life. I click play and I'm watching this video and the only way to describe is garbage is found in today's display picture. The world's most influential artists just pissed on a classic that should have never been touched in the first place. Was auto-tune from T-Pain and Lil Wayne really necessary? Why the fuck is Randy Jackson singing? Who the hell recruited Swizz Beatz, Snoop Dogg, Kanye West and Busta Rhymes to "rap" a verse.

The video was supposed to be representative of the future and bring awareness to children and the unity we as humans should possess. Instead it was like listening to the noises my Pops makes in the washroom after he has a #3 (the Cheesy Bean Burrito) combo at Taco-Bell. Why the fuck was a codeine addict, Lil Wayne singing looking all retarded with the 10000 tattoos? Who the hell invited Fergie and her meth pipe to the studio? Why the hell was Snoop Dogg, the guy most famous for smoking weed and his affiliation with the Crips in a video about children? What the fuck did I just watch? Are meth, codeine, and marijuana addicts supposed to show kids a brighter path and give them hope for the future? Lionel Richie's daughter can't keep her legs closed  and will suck every cock on Rodeo drive yet he's directing this shit trying to be a role model. The video also has multiple cuts of Michael Jackson. The problem with this is the fact that in 1985 when the original came out, Michael was black, semi-normal, and still a role model. 25 years later we found out he was a pedophile, a freak and when he died he had a " veritable pharmacy running through his veins." If that doesn't scream role model I don't know what will.

"We are the World" makes me want to jump off a bridge so I don't have to associate myself with these people. Akon dry-fucked the shit out of a 14 year old on a stage in Trinidad yet there he is singing with every other freak in that song. Miley Cyrus...really? No one wants to hear the lead-singer in the Pussy Cat Dolls sing, we just want to watch her dance. The song is just fucking wack and it represents our society in 2010. A bunch of skinny-jeans wearing faggots who think they are helping the world but instead fucking with history and making asses out of themselves. Lil Wayne is going to jail for a year at the end of the month yet he's supposed to be a role model in the eyes of children all over the world. LL Cool J hasn't been relevant in the last 15 years yet we're expected to give money to Haiti (4 weeks after the fact) because LL told us too.Half the shit wasn't even in English it was Wyclef yelling in Haitian giberish like he just had a tranny bite off his cock. There's no hope, fighting a losing battle and I think if I ever have a kid I'm just going to tattoo a rainbow flag to his shoulder and consider it a loss because We Are In a World full of jackasses.

Recapping Picks: Nope the drought continues. 2-3 on the day and 36-30 on the month. Just a complete off day and I should of done better. Hoping the slide stops now.

Today's Picks: Going back to the NBA shit but ask yourself this...would you bet against Lebron, Wade, Howard and Bosh in anything?

East vs West (NBA)....................................East (Pick)
Ohio St. vs Illinois........................................Ohio St -1.5
Minnesota vs Northwestern.........................Minnesota -1
Syracuse vs Louisville..................................Syracuse -7.5
St Johns vs Notre Dame.............................Notre Dame -5.5

May the winners be ours. Taking over the world one step at a time. Incase you haven't gotten the memo my name is Julius James and I'm the fucking shit.

Saturday, February 13, 2010

The Most Accurate Respresentation of Canada, Ever.

For those of you wondering about the picture, it has nothing to do with anything but it's more amusing than anything that was on television last night. I told myself I wasn't going to watch that gay Olympics shit but with no where to go and having to choose between that or the NBA Rookie garbage I decided to flick back and forth. I must say it was a fantastic job done by whoever organized it and props go out to them. These olympics are shaping up to be a great representation of Canada. Using taxpayers money to transport snow, creating tracks so dangerous people are dying before the event even starts and having such a fucking gay ceremony.

What the fuck was that piece of shit? These Olympics are costing us $8 billion and it's as if the people in charge of organizing it decided to blow 7 billion on 3D porn so they could masturbate interactively. I'm still trying to process what I just saw. Wayne Gretzky in the back of some pick-up truck being chased by a punch of punk kids and a bunch of Natives who were probably paid in alcohol and tobacco jumping around inside BC place like they just found a bottle of Jack Daniels. There was some kid singing the National Anthem and she was up there so long it was like she went through an entire Miley Cyrus cd. The fake snow, the gay acrobatic shit, it was all just a big mess. To top it all off I flick to the channel just in time to see a fat Clay Aiken start singing and then someone on twitter tells me that it's KD Lang. I'm thinking this fat Clay Aiken dude's real name is probably Kane David Lang so I go to wikipedia to figure out who the fuck this guy is.

Nope, it's some dyke chick named Kathryn Dawn Lang. Of course we can't forget the token black guy from Ghana but for fuck sakes even the Jamaicans were white. The ceremony was a big hump fest for Native folks and French people, both virtually non-existant in relevant parts of Canada. The Native ones are all bitching in far off places where nobody has to put up with them and there are like 20k French people in Canada and they all can be seen at the Bell Centre on Saturday nights. However someone thought it was a great idea to involve them in the Olympics because we in Canada celebrate unity. So when the world looked to Canada last night what did they see? An ugly lesbian singing, a bootleg Miley Cyrus, the death of a 21 year old athlete in which everyone will forget tomorrow, teens chasing Wayne Gretzky in the back of a pick-up truck, a bunch of Natives running around acting fucked up, the French language in a place where the French are secluded with their shitty hockey team, and we can't forget the one black guy from Ghana who is almost certain to place last in whichever event he competes in. Go Canada!

Recapping Picks: The fuck was I doing betting on that dumb rookie shit? Managed to stop the bleeding with Pitt pulling off that victory after 3 OTs. I feel the slump coming on but hopefully it fucks off today. 1-2 on the day and 34-27 on the month.

Today's Picks:

UConn vs Cincy..........................UConn -6
Michigan St. vs Penn St...............Michigan St -7
U of Miami vs Clemson...............U of Miami +9.5
Kent St vs Buffalo.......................Kent St -1
South Florida vs Marquette.........South Florida +9

May the winners be ours. Taking over the world one step at a time. Incase you haven't gotten the memo my name is Julius James and I'm the fucking shit.

Friday, February 12, 2010

The Latest Epidemic to Plague Our Society

At one time or another we've all had the club lights come on. She was hot when the lights were off now all of a sudden she looks like Helen Hunt after Cast Away was released. Sometimes we paid a little more than we should (drinks, drugs, chloroform) whatever works and she just happened to be at the "paper bag stage." If you hit it or not, no one would  judge because you were fooled by the lights, it happens. However the new disease out there that we have to watch out for is Makeupfoolitis. I've fallen for it far too much in the last little while and apparently a lot of you guys are doing just the same.

You see her one day, she's hot, stunning, beautiful, gives you an instant erection and then you see her without the makeup and it's "Good God I asked for Janet not LeToya Jackson." Now the ugly hoes which once used club lights to trick us are now using innovative techniques to do the trick. Darkness was once their savior to mask their ugliness but in this day and age they are just using masks. One chick I would chat with at school was pretty hot and smart. International Business relations was her major and she had everything working for her. Few months later we happened to be riding the same bus ( This isn't Detroit, you don't have to be poor to ride the bus) and I couldn't even recognize her. She looked like an MMA fighter and I'm not talking Gina Carano. It's terrible becausenow you could get tricked into thinking a chick is hot in broad day-light.

There are internet chicks now using fake display pictures. Back in the day they would use their real picture and photoshop certain elements. Today you could see a chick who draws similitaries to Halle Berry and when you do finally meet up with her you realize she looks more like Al Roker with a wig. Of course you went through all the hassle of meeting the Al Roker looking chick so you're definitely going to hit it but at what cost? Estee Lauder needs to stop selling this stuff because it's getting out of hand. There are chicks using loads upon loads of this shit to mask their ugly ass looking selves and it's costing us our pride, cash, and time. It's a strange world we live in something made of whale blubber and tested on Porky the pig could enhance one's beauty 10 fold. I think more guys need to be like me: When the going gets tough, have no worry because I'll strangle my dick like it owes me money. Words to live by right there!

Recapping Picks: Thursday night what's new. 2-3 on the night and 33-25 on the month. Lack of sports coming up but if you're a compulsive gambler like myself you'll just see the positive and start betting dumb shit.

Todays Picks: Speaking of dumb shit: I'll be pounding this NBA all star Rookie crap. I won't even watch it but there's money to be made and looking at the rosters I like a team with Derrick Rose, OJ Mayo, and Michael Beasley too destroy the rookies.

Sophomores vs Rookies (NBA).....................Sophomores -12
Sophomores vs Rookies (NBA).....................Under 245.5
West Virginia vs Pittsburgh...............................Pittsburgh +2.5

May the winners be ours. Taking over the world one step at a time. Incase you haven't gotten the memo my name is Julius James and I'm the fucking shit.