An Amazing Business Idea

I scheduled my day around Champions League but because those Euros have their useless ass daylight savings time before us, I had an hour to kill. There's never anything on tv but as I went through the guide I found this show that everyone keeps talking about: Diners, Drive-ins and Dives. I never watch the food network because I'm black and I don't see the point in watching other people cook then enjoy food and I can't have any. Some people claim to watch it for recipes but unless I could make the dish at the very same time I'm watching the show then I find it fucking useless but I said why the fuck not. I've since watched 4 episodes of this show (apparently Food Network TV have nothing better to show in the daytime so they show the fat-ass on your left in high-def 50 times a day). 

However, I couldn't help but ask myself, why the fuck do people like this shit. The guy goes to a place where they make a Cheeseburger soup, no fucking shit it tastes good the thing probably has 6000 calories and will give you a stroke after 6 bites. Then the next episode he goes to this place where they make BLTs with 700 different kinds of mayo, all sorts of fried shit, then they deep fry it all and add like 6 different layers of cheese, no shit it's going to taste good but that doesn't mean it's a great fucking dish, anyone could do that. Then I think about all the fat fucks they were interviewing "I've been going here since 1989 ordering the same thing twice a week." Then you wonder why you're fucking fat, live in your grandmother's basement, collecting her pension and jerking off to the texts between you and the fat girl you met off World of Warcraft who lives 2000 miles away in buttfuck, Missouri but you hope she'll be the one to take your virginity.

Then I started thinking, why the fuck don't I or someone reading cash in on the fat dumbasses of this world. I researched the fattest place in Canada, which is St. Catherines Ontario. 57.3% of their residents are over-weight. So here's how you make money. You buy a place around a high school and business area. You deck the place out in diner looking shit. Then you hire an illegal Mexican, tell him "no farming you cook for me and I give you 36 pesos a day (about 3 usd) Then you get that fucker to deep fry Haagen-Dazs, add 5 layers of Bacon, 4 different kinds of cheese, waffle fries, a tonne of mayo and ground beef that Health Canada probable grades a C. You take all that shit, make one massive sandwich and get that bi-sexual fuck in today's display picture to come talk about how amazing it is. To top it all off, add a pickle to the shit and call it the "Healthy Burger" because it has a vegetable in it. The fat-asses will never leave and Food Network will have people believing it's something created by a culinary expert in France. Kill two birds with one stone, make money and the fat dumb asses who have no purpose on this planet but to eat and strike up conversations with strangers outside of Walmart will die quicker. 

Recapping the Night: Such a horrible play of the day, I have to apologize for that. I make a killing betting against Dasher then I take him with the logic that he'd play great today. I was watching the game thinking this could be a 66-1 Queens vs University of Toronto like ass kicking. 

Soccer:
$200 Manchester United -135= Return of $348.15 (W)
$200 Inter +170 (L)
Scott's Pick:
$200 Schalke +110 (L)
NHL:
$200 Sens +120= Return of $440 (W)
$12 MTL to win by 3 +1200 (L)
NBA:
$200 Hawks -3.5 -110= Return of $381.82 (W)
$200 Lakers/Memphis over 201.5 -110= Return of $381.82 (W)
Play of the Day:
$600 Middle Tenn. St. -1.5 (L)
Total Wagered: $1812
Total Returned: $1551.79
Total Loss: $260.21
Total Earned to Date: $3853.90

Contact Info: BustaBusta_2001@yahoo.com

May the winners be ours. Taking over the world one step at a time. In case you haven't gotten the memo my name is Julius James and I'm the fucking shit.