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Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Once Again I'm Confused

I've been banging this Colombian girl for a while now. She's pretty hot but my word this girl knows how to suck a mean dick. She's filthy rich because her dad probably has Little Pepe sticking coke up his ass and carrying it to different countries but this girl is sexy and rich and loves to swallow my kids. There's only one problem, she's dumber than people who donate to Wikipedia. Is it unethical and immoral to be banging someone who probably wouldn't pass a standard grade 7 math test? At first the head and sex was great and I thought this could very well be the one if I don't fuck it up but I'm coming to the realization that I much rather be doing the chinese girls at the back of Chinese restaurants who spend their days peeling vegetables and nodding at strangers. 

This chick is beyond stupid. She doesn't do anything because she's rich. I'm convinced all she ever does is watch Gossip Girl and sleep. Every time I try and talk to her she's always busy watching Gossip Girl. Is there a motherfucking channel on the television that just plays the show on repeat. However I knew things were headed down-hill when we went out last week. I had shit to do and her ass is too busy watching Gossip Girl to get a license so I told her to meet me at Sheppard Station's subway platform. She texted me 6 times asking me where it was. Bitch you do fuck all look it the fuck up. Then she asked me if she could get back home at 3pm because she wants to bake a cake for her mother's birthday. Uh ya okay bitch I just want my dick sucked in a park you can go home whenever. However my entire day was filled with my phone going off. No matter where I was I would open my phone and see texts like: "Omg I'm on the bus." "Now I'm sitting at the back and there are poor people starring at me." "How do I tell the bus driver I want to get off the bus, does he stop at every stop" "What if I miss my stop, what will I do then" 

Bitch you are 23 fucking years old, if this were 40 years ago you'd be out in the garden and raising 4 kids while I sat at home, drank all day and watched the Three Stooges. I used to think damn this girl is too damn hot to be with someone like me and now I finally know why. It's like being with someone who has the mental capacity of Arnold Jackson in Different Strokes, you guys have no idea how torturous this shit is. When we aren't banging she'll tell me about how her life is so similar to Gossip Girl. Or how her arm hurts because she had had to lift a UPS package from the front door to the kitchen and it was heavy and thus it ruined her day. The other day she made me promise that I'd consider marrying her or she'd consider leaving because she wants someone who is committed. It took every cell in my body to not get up and scream how I wish her ass was deported. I said yes because I wanted head and knew I'd buy myself 3 non-talkative, sex-filled days. I clearly don't wanna marry this Eva Mendez looking ass but I don't want to let her go. 5 years from now when I'm working at Best Buy trying to tell some spoiled kid's parents that their kid needs the best laptop we can offer and I'm going to think back how I could have made it with this Colombian hoe. Yet that's a lifetime of conversations with someone who gets confused by the story-line in Spongebob Squarepants ....decisions decisions.

Recapping the night: Well done Scott. 
NBA:
$200 Knicks +4.5 -110 (L)
NCAAF:
$400 Northern Illinois -10.5= Return of $763.64 (W)
Scott's Pick:
$100 Tampa -1.5 +190= Return of $290 (W)
Total Wagered: $700
Total Returned: $1053.64
Total Profit: $353.64
Total Earned to Date: $5748.08

Contact Info: BustaBusta_2001@yahoo.com
May the winners be ours. Taking over the world one step at a time. In case you haven't gotten the memo my name is Julius James and I'm the fucking shit.

15 comments:

Scott said...

What you think about over 2.5 (+105) in the manchester derby. Thats a lot of firepower on the field.

BronxBomber said...

They got shut out by WBA but you're right. Derby day brings about weird things. Will take it.

Unknown said...

found a good way to cash in.combination bets in the early rounds of tennis. not to often that the top 1-10 lose in the first 2 rounds of a tourniment. the odds r usually low but toss 4-5 together with a decent bet and it could be quite effective. i cashed nice last night just by tossing the big names on a ticket. just wanted to give ya guys the heads up if ya dident already know this

Scott said...

Ya its pretty low risk, but all it takes is one upset to lose a good amount of money

Unknown said...

oh totally. just looked at the stats and saw that the top 5 make it past the first 2 rounds 94% of the time. ill take those odds anyday.

Unknown said...

St Louis 1.83
boston 2.10
both on the money line and really banking on the net minders here. if tim thomas stands out tonight he can steal the game. as far as st louis well they r rideing a 7 game win streak and halak could very well be the best golie in the game.

BronxBomber said...

Thanks will take em for small plays on both. I'm out for the night (got class) good luck to everyone and I hope I get a fucking internet connection in class.

Scott said...

Chi-city -1.5 (+175) against Labarbera and the Coyotes?

Unknown said...

yeah there at home as well. coyotes have fucked me so many time already tho lol. the hawks r due for a light up game tho maybe tonight ill take that pick.

Unknown said...

tough start for stl. fuck me !!

Unknown said...

well halak sure aint playing like the best golie in the nhl tonight lol

Unknown said...

man had a brutal night tonight in the nhl. halak really stunk it up tonight. sorry about that one. thomas came through for me tho.

BronxBomber said...

anyone bet this ncaaf game? LMAO there is so much fog I cant see anything on the stream. Unbelievable. It won't go over but it's hilarious, never seen a game so foggy. Miami figured it out though

Unknown said...

i took miami on the spread with a panthers compination in hockey tonight.

Unknown said...

combination i ment lol