The JJ Break-Up Plan

So the time has come, she's wack and you can't stand her anymore and you want to kick her ass to the curb. How do you do it? For the record men aren't supposed to break up with women. You're supposed to do dumb shit until she leaves your ass, men don't refuse the box for anything else. I only broke up with one chick cause she was insane and went through my emails and said she'd kill herself or some dumb shit.  I told her "alright well before you off yourself just know that you're doing that as a single person. Then I told her to listen to this: The Break-Up Song while killing herself" Yet I'll admit, sometimes there is a point of no return and you just have to cut the cord. It isn't easy and requires a lot of thought so here's various steps you could take that would make the process easier: 

For the Asshole- If you use social networks such as facebook just change your status from "in a relationship" to "single." It's the one great thing facebook is good for, you never have to speak to the chick in person. When she asks just tell her "it is what it is" and that's that. If you don't fuck with the social networks then call her or text her " It's over, I found someone else, K Thanks For everything, bye!" People perceive you as an asshole for doing this but why the fuck should you put yourself in a position of awkwardness. If you do it in person then ask yourself, what benefit am I getting from this? Will she suck your dick after you drop the news? No. Will she send you money? No. Will She cook you a hot meal? No. She'll cry and/or get physical. The fuck you putting yourself in that position for, I don't care if you were with her for 40 years, don't place yourself in that gay ass position.

Face to Face- Yet because of societal norms, some of y'all insist on breaking up face to face. If you're an asshole then get some head first. Here's how to successfully break-up with a chick in person. You have a 10 minute window of "numbness" before she starts thinking irrationally and acts on her impulses. When you go to visit her, bring a box of assorted cookies or chocolates. Why? because no one hates this shit, even if they hate one, that shit comes with such a big variety that it's going to comfort her. Drop the news and say "I think I should leave." Get the fuck out. You wack dudes that stay to watch her cry and shit, nah, the fuck can you gain from that. She's already formulated opinions about your ass and hates you, get the fuck out. 

The Golden Treasure- Some of y'all are lucky. She's so insecure or she loves you so much that she'll sink to new levels of desperation. If she starts getting desperate, cash the fuck in. Be realistic, it won't last but at least you get to milk the cow (no pun intended). She might say "no no no please don't" and act like a pathetic ass loser, don't get it twisted, she is a pathetic ass loser but cash in. She'll offer to buy you video games, give you sex on demand, give into a 3some, cook you whatever you want and do shit you wouldn't even hire Mexicans for. Cash in, she'll come to the realization that you aren't shit and you're not worth it and will leave your ass soon enough but at least you benefited from the break-up. 

Recapping the night: 11-9 with a crapload of close games.

Plays of the Day:
Knicks +6 -110 (L)
Syracuse -2 -110 (W)


NBA:
Lakers/Heat over 188 -110 (L)

NCAAB:
Miami/Virginia over 121.5 -110 (W)
Auburn/Georgia over 125 -110 (L)
UConn +5.5 -110 (W)
Syracuse/St. Johns over 135 -110 (W)
Northwestern -1 -110 (W)
Iowa/Michigan St. over 130 -110 (L)
Texas/Oklahoma over 130.5 -110 (L)
Notre Dame -2 -110 (W)
Cincy/Notre Dame over 132 -110 (W)
Penn St. -4 -110 (W)
Penn St/Indiana over 129 -110 (L)
Marshall UTep over 137 -110 (W)
Utah/San Diego St. over 126 -110 (L)
Missouri/Texas A&M over 136.5 -110 (W)
Tulsa -5 -110 (W)
Vanderbelt -13 -110 (L)
Air Force/UNLV over 123.5 -110 (L)

Contact Info: Moneyhungry45@hotmail.com

May the winners be ours. Taking over the world one step at a time. In case you haven't gotten the memo my name is Julius James and I'm the fucking shit.