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Friday, September 17, 2010

The Jersey Shore

I will admit I watched season 1 and enjoyed the hell out of this borderline mentally sadistic show. Now I just watch it because I have insomnia and there's only so many times I could play with my cock or play bejeweled on facebook. Season One was great because it portrayed people who are far removed from reality who compensate for various deprivations by having a desired fantasy that becomes their reality. (you might have to light one up to understand that) In negro terms: They were so gay that their gayness became a part of who they were. Now that the mystery has been solved I have no idea how regular people enjoy this shit, I just do it to kill time. It isn't funny, it's highly fabricated and the females look like Joan Rivers. 

The only thing I could get from this show in season 2 is that these people love to look orange, have fake tits that don't fit them, and every night they get drunk and dance. Millions upon millions of people would love to trade places with these people and I can't understand why. Sure they make good money but intrinsically they are damaged beyond belief. I could study an entire semester on the Jersey Shore cast and it still wouldn't be enough. They aren't funny, they aren't attractive, their lives are fabricated and designed for television which results in a predictable outcome. The weak acting skills have worn thin, the mass stereotypes of Italians have failed (Snooki is Chilean for fuck sakes) and they wear tight clothes, make up words that don't exist and are protected 24/7. Yet people are still drawn to this shit, kids aspire to be these people and I can't help but feel I contributed to a world that glorifies the Jersey Shore cast. I still fucking watch it no matter how much I bitch and complain (though this season more out of necessity than choice)

Once again this show exemplifies everything wrong in the world that we've defined. Instead of glorifying single-mothers who work their asses off everyday of their lives we worship train wrecks like Snooki who is famous for no reason at all other than she's orange and likes to fuck. Instead of the kid who took his body to enormous, unimaginable strengths during chemotherapy in order to beat cancer, we watch "The Situation" talk about how amazing he is for an hour and we tune in next week where we could watch him talk for another hour about how great his abs are and how he plays ugly women. M.A.S.H was a good fucking show. Hogan's Heroes was another great fucking show. Hell I'd even be inclined to say Survivor was once a good show. Jersey Shore is nothing more than a circus that gets replayed every week for one hour and when it's all said and done the cast rakes up millions in appearance fees for doing absolutely nothing. Change we believe in.

Recapping the night:
Soccer:
$200 Athletico Madrid -120 (L)
$200 Villareal +110 (L)
$200 Aek Athens -125= Return of $360 (W)
Play of the Day:
$500 Manchester City -138= Return of $863.64 (W)
College Football:
$500 NC State -1.5 -110= Return of $945.55 (W)
$400 NC State/Cincy over 54 -110 (L)
Baseball:
$200 Twins -110= Return of $381.82 (W)
Total Wagered: $2200
Total Returned: $2551.01
Total Profit: $351.01
Total Earned to Date: $2448.15

Contact Info: BustaBusta_2001@yahoo.com

May the winners be ours. Taking over the world one step at a time. Incase you haven't gotten the memo my name is Julius James and I'm the fucking shit.

4 comments:

TB said...

I have to disagree. I think Sitch is one funny freaking guy, and far smarter than the rest. I could watch a show with him, Paulie and Vinny for years. The rest are mental midgets that only occasionally offer something, with Jennie being slightly less useless than the rest.

BronxBomber said...

He's set to make $5 million this year and I just don't see it. He has his moments but I think all the time he's playing those girls (For example when he calls her a cab or they have 2 separate girls at a different part of the house) it's all staged.

With that said he made me laugh my ass off at 3am this morning when he brought the sandwich into his bedroom and ate it while Paulie was plowing some girl.

TB said...

Clearly a good chunk of it is staged. Not sure too many girls would say "yeah, I'll get down with you" and not know there are cameras in play to give them their 15 minutes.

He's got endorsements happening now too, and makes more than anyone on the show to be on the show. That's no fluke I'd say.

Prediction for Ronnie: he dies from a heart attack by 33, WWE style, from years of Roid abuse.

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