Best picture ever and one of you will know why. Before I begin I want to thank y'all for the support from that bone marrow thing. A lot of people been hitting me up, telling me they're spreading the word and filling out the info necessary for the swabs, it's greatly appreciated but only the beginning. I was on the block today because I wanted to go get a Toonie Tuesday deal at Pablos which is a Caribbean takeout spot. A kid about 18 gets off the bus and tries to walk into the subdivision ( I don't know what a subdivision is but I heard someone say it so I assume it fits) in a pink Hollister shirt. These niggas made the kid take off the shirt then threw it in this big ass garbage bin lmao. Telling him not to even think of coming in here with that shit. Y'all wrong for that but shit was fucking hilarious. Here are some parenting tips from a dude who isn't a parent but had a few pregnancy scares:
1) Don't Expect Teachers/Other Kids To Raise Your Kid
The reason this world is full of faggotry in 2011 is because of you lazy ass parents. Stop having teachers and shit raise your kids. Give them a motherfucking book, beat their ass when they act up. Take them out and reward there asses when they do good. The reason kids out here acting like faggots is because they being raised by some white ass teacher who wears Loafers and wears a robe and shit. Who the fuck wears a robe. Real niggas wear boxers and a tee, real chicks wear a tank top and boy shorts (the greatest look ever on a woman)
2) Stop protecting your kid.
When you protect your kid, you make them a pussy. Let them fight, let them do whatever the fuck they want but make sure they know the rules. I been hanging around drug dealers and fucked up people since I was 9 years old. My parents know this shit but they feel they instilled enough values in me to not fuck around. I got no criminal record and I graduated every motherfucking semester of high school with an 80 average and despite being fucked up, I did okay. Stop making your kids pussy, let them live but make sure they know the rules. (for example, I knew/know if my mom ever did/do caught/catch me smoking weed, my clothes will be out on the front lawn even at 22) I ain't stupid enough to get caught doing dumb shit and I take my spliffs selectively.
3) Don't Make Excuses
If your kid is a fuck up, then they are a fuck up. Stop blaming everyone for your kid being a fuck up. Beat their motherfucking ass when they fuck up. My cousin is 18 and a complete alcoholic. His parents blame his drinking on his friends. Ya, your son drinks a half bottle of vodka a day because his friends put a gun to his head.
4) Don't Listen to Motherfuckin Society.
Society is for the faggots. Them niggas tell you that you shouldn't shower twice a day and shit because it's bad for your skin. Fuck off. Society will ruin your motherfucking kid and have a 16 year old boy inside listening to Katy Perry instead of outside chasing pussy. Do whatever you think is right, stop reading books and shit about parenting and don't be afraid to beat their ass or tell them to fuck up. Don't be afraid to hug and kiss your kid either, trust me they appreciate it.
5) Don't think of your motherfucking self.
Parents these days y'all think about your motherfucking self too much. Being a parent is a fucking sacrifice. Y'all out there watching Desperate Housewives and Dancing with the Stars when you should be beating your kid's ass or reading a book with the nigga. You gotta put your kids before yourself or you'll be a bad fucking parent and your kid will grow up to be a tour guide who fucks tourists on the side for $20 dollars in coins.
Honorable Mention:
Trust is everything. If you trust that you did a good job instilling values in your kid then you will never have to worry. Don't be their facebook friends and shit, that'll just piss em off and rebel and they'll do meth with punk rock kids and shit.
Don't back down. Some of y'all scared of your kids then you get surprised when they fucked up. Teach em who the fuck is the boss by taking a belt to that ass when they want to fuck around.
Make sure they ain't faggots. No skinny jeans, hollister, abercrombie and fitch, snapback hats.
Your kid will grow up to be exactly like you. If you a heaux, your kid will be a heaux. If you a faggot, your kid will be a faggot. If you a good person, your kid will be a good person. Lead by motherfucking example and shit, stop thinking your kid will miraculously learn about life on their own, they wont. Some of y'all give up too easily on this shit and it's making your kid get stripped silly in the hood. Stop it.
1 comment:
wow, for a guy who has never been a parent, you sure damn well make a load of sense! I hope all parents read this blog, they will learn more than a 400 page "how to make your kid love you" book.
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